Twisted Todd
Has anyone seen Twisted Todd? We haven't seen him in HOURS. He's out looking for his pen.
 

Nine




Maybe my favorite time of year

I've always loved Halloween. Since I was a little kid and I wanted to be a vampire every year, back when vampires were counts rather than twinks.
My dad would go rent scary movies on his way home from work. This is when he had two legs. Like Night of the Demons and the Halloween sequels and whatever horror movies were on the shelves at the Video Express in Berea. From as far back as I can remember, I was watching the most deplorably sick films ever produced. I remember it well from the time I was around four. My somewhat twisted mind (some would say. not me. I think I'm the coolest.) only began to twist when these movies were introduced to me. When I was a preschooler watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Or when I was 7 or 8 and discovered the Slumber Party Massacre. Wow, the boobs and the naked and the blood and the murder.
Now that I think about it, this is how serial killers are made. We're all lucky I didn't turn out that way. I'd probably be in better shape, but that's an awful lot of responsibility and I don't want to be given a death penalty for anything. I also don't want to kill anyone who isn't trying to kill me. That's a pretty important part of not being a serial killer.
Nowadays, my dad would probably be guilty of child abuse. But back then, when men were men and kids were constantly terrified of the unfiltered stuff we saw on TV, he was a hero to myself and all the other sick children in the neighborhood. And he made sure I loved Halloween, even if he didn't care much for it. He never liked holidays much. Just movies, because it meant I'd watch TV and let him smoke cigarettes in peace.


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10/28/2011 12:46PM
Maybe my favorite time of year
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