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Matthew "Mattman" Harris

Chapter 11

Hi, how's it going? Pretty good here. My dream of going on Wheel Of Fortune may be coming true. I've been playing the online game like hell and entering. Well over the weekend I got an email inviting me to come to Atlanta next month to tryout. So that's pretty cool I suppose. Are you like me, do you freakin love Big Brother? This is the first season I've ever watched but I love it. I like reality shows. I like the idea of taking 12 strangers from all walks of life putting them in a cage and letting them go at it. Mike Vick tried a similar project with dogs and it got him labeled the Devil. I think C-Section scars on women are kinda hot. I also think pregnant women in general are hot. It would sound like I have a pregnancy fetish, but I don't. In fact, I wouldn't even want to have sex with them. I'd rather cuddle up with my fatty little friend and sleep with the air on 60 degrees. Regardless, pregnant women aren't sexually attractive to me, I just want to hang out with them. I liken it to people who love their nieces and nephews but don't want any kids of their own. The last time a girl told me she was pregnant with my baby I moved to Greenville, SC and changed my name to Maffew. Mr. Harris, if you're nasty. Let's talk Reba. Very strange accent when she "sangs" and facial expressions that rival that of Jack Nicholson as The Joker. But the sound, oh so sweet. It's like what I imagine the sirens sounded like in mythology. If my boat was lost in the fog, "Reber's" awkwardly soothing voice would lead me home. Also, she looks like Kathy Griffin and the Cheshire Cat had sex and had a baby. I'm Matt and that's what I'm thinking and my mind's going 90 MPH.

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09/01/2009 7:44PM
Chapter 11
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